music

I am SO ENVIOUS of anyone who can play music: who can make others hear what they feel. To take what's in your chest and manifest it into something audible, something tangible must be the ultimate release. I walk around feeling like I'm full to overflowing all the time, but the pressure just keeps building. I want someone to reach in here and grab what I'm holding onto and pull it from me. I spend so much time trying to say it, fumbling for words that I can hardly ever find. I try and try to write my passion, but I cannot develop it into something suitable, something that truly mirrors what I feel, something that releases me from it. I could take my heart and soul and freely give it, have it turned inside out, dissected, digested, if someone could just connect with me on that level. So when I find music that I truly love - it's because someone is creating something that I can connect with, that I can feel along side them for as long as I'm listening... something that releases a little of this pressure. Thank god there are people who can do that.